I suffer anxiety, but as a writer and artist, I don’t often find unpleasant emotions the sources of inspiration. I prefer to look at and dwell on beauty and ideas.
When I feel fear, I feel physically sick; it’s no so much racing thoughts but the physical sensations that make it so uncomfortable.
A couple of years ago, inspiration hit me. I imagine my fear sometimes like a sticky black gloop that lives inside of me. Feat feels like that, cold, dank, clammy, and it creates stagnation and paralysis.
I have this idea of vomiting out that sticky mess, which you see here as art. I mixed up some paint or ink and threw it down onto the canvas.
To throw it up is to liberate; sure, it is horrible to throw up, but the feeling after matters—a lighter, purged feeling of clarity, healing and calm.
Fear is what keeps us small, stagnant, and it’s what we have to deal with when creating anything new, including art.
So this is a sort of art and creativity becoming the subject matter of a painting.
Art can help with anxiety, helping us get it out of out system, like vomit.